mind is once again in the same day blown*(the "Dude")
<< 12:57 a.m. - Friday, Sept. 20, 2002 >>
Ahhh!! Its late but I have so much to say! What is that all about? Anyways...I finally talked to The "DUDE", I mean in a realistic way, i finally helped him break through his old opinions of me. I guess i could always feel it when we talked before. Like I was talking too much, or just talking about nothing at all. I could never get past "I dunno." I would shut down and exit the scene.

And finally, it got clear. He read this journal.

Cobain Unplugged: I underestimate you. living in a memory, I guess you could say?

We were finally able to really talk. It had never happened before, even when we dated. I felt like I could really put my feelings on the table. I did this with Black Nails as well. I am building the bonds of strong relationships. Things are really looking up. I've managed to drag myself out of my self made "pit of dispair." Yay! I am so ecstatic!

"Cobain Unplugged: I really don't know what to think about you Kelsi. I don't handle changing people well."

So i have changed. Thank god. It was so subtle i didn't really notice. But upon looking back i realize i don't like the person back there. Who in 6th grade couldn't bear to hear the word "puberty". GAH! what a freakish being I was.

Homework status? Not going well captain, it seems she is too distracted by the new things in her life to bother with such insignificant trash....damn we lost her."

Good bye guilt (not really, oh well)

kelso