ocean life
<< past 3 (morning) - 11-30-02 >>
Maybe I�m not unique � the light that glows around me is unseen � because there are lights everywhere.

I looked out into the smoky darkness beyond my window and heard the crashing of the sea against ageless rocks. What if a tidal wave came crashing through my window in my sleep? I could not stop it. I forget how little power I really have. Pretend I�m truly free when others are oppressed. (that sounds like a bumper sticker phrase)

Would it matter if I died in my sleep with the water pouring in? So many lights shining � one created every second. What would it matter if one was extinguished? Would there be a flicker?

I�m not morbid. I�m not depressed. I thought of the feelings that I evolve through every hour of the day. No one would know if I changed my mind about something. I felt truly happy in those seconds before the ocean�s surge hit me.

All I have is a journal. I cling to it. A chronical of the sometimes over dramatized life I lead. I disagree with what I say ten minutes later. Who is to say this will mean nothing to me tomorrow?

Maybe it is just important that we experience one true feeling. Something that burns our hearts and put glowing embers into our ghostly faces.

Maybe we live for feeling.