Waiting for an Extra Heart
<< 10:27 p.m. - Friday, Apr. 04, 2003 >>
I really should consider ridding myself of all the love songs I own. But, aren�t most good songs about love, loss, or loneliness? I might not have much left. I don�t know. I find that every time I listen to them, I get all melty and find myself creating wild and unrealistic scenarios.

Driving past Mt. Tabor tonight with Megan gave me this moon filled image of two people making out (myself as one of the two) What the hell? It�s sort of fun but completely ridiculous when I finally return to earth. I�ve gone from completely hormone less to full flung �boy crazy.� It�s fucking freaking me out.

Seems all wrong. With such unreal dreams, I know in my heart of hearts that I�m setting myself up for disaster. Pinning hopes up. Only to watch the pins release from the unstable walls, and come flying at me. How can I find a solid real wall/boy?

I want to say more but I�ve decided to cut it off. I could go on forever about a topic like this�.