Little Pony
<< 10:55 p.m. - Tuesday, Sept. 30, 2003 >>
�i've got a lack of inhibition
i've got a loss of perspective
i've had a little bit to drink
and it's making me think
that i can jump ship and swim
that the ocean will hold me
that there's got to be more
than this boat i'm in�

I open the folder at the side of this screen that is not mine. I don�t even want it to be. And inside �Kelsi� and past the �Three Week Hell,� which seems much longer that it should be is the commonplace document I love. Yeahyeahyeah.

Entry of substance? Doubt it. I am a teenage puppet. I am a school time robot. A finished assignment gives me utmost pleasure, and it is once again a joy to clean and organize my room. Scrub the floor with psychotic precision. Arrange my papers in little piles on the floor. I told her I bend rules to my will, and now, I stand up and they come back to slap me in the face. Guitar strings that aren�t in tune and ring ominously. Thwack. I can�t stay within these cramped boundaries I deserve. I am reverting my compulsive past, just like I feared. I feel broken. I feel unlike myself.

These strings on my hands are taught, and I must obey, finally. Every time they look away, and the strings relax, I regain seconds of free will and attempt my escape. Pulled back again into my performance. Watch Kelsi care about school. Baby can�t put on her apathy mask. Baby, we�re saving you.