Arena
<< 8:43 p.m. - Saturday, Mar. 15, 2008 >>
And I don�t know if this was the way that you wanted it,
but this is who I have become.
It wasn�t your hand that held the sand just so,
letting the aqueous droplets fall to the ground
and forming this lumpy castle of which I have constructed myself.
But I�d like to say you were the wind.
Whispering in my ear to "D�jalo caer."

And I have.
Talking to you today I felt so disconnected and
�
distant.

This is my life now,
full of so many unknown roads.
I try and stop looking ahead to scan them out -
focus on the scenery
and when I get back to you
it�s different.

There has been so much silence
�
these past two months.
That dreaming of you and I last night,
dream-you didn�t want to kiss me
and dream-me couldn�t say I love you.

But I do.
Or I think I do.
This doubt, this willingness to let things fall freely
Still feels odd
in sand filled hand.