Ship's Deck and My Love for the Stars
<< 9:00 p.m. - Sunday, Aug. 03, 2003 >>
I'm cut. I'm free. This world is like a blank page I have only to put my pen to. Who will throw themselves as bait when the bad things come?

I got my wish and overstepped the bounds of legality. Slipped passed the bars of the ship and received all that I had been craving. Clouds finally lifted in every sense. There they were. Thousands of tiny white orbs that capture and mesmerize me with the idea of infinity. Fours shooting stars in my night lit eyes. Oh holy rapture. Galaxies were spread before me.

And you will come to find that we are all one mind
Capable of all that's imagined and all conceivable.
Just let the light touch you
And let the words spill through
And let them pass right through
Bringing out our hope and reason ...
before we pine away.

I was bound to the world today. Wrapped up in the inexorable vines of ivy I've spent so many years trying to strip from the ground. And for once comfortable in the closeness it brought me.

I don't care where I go. This world is not mine to control. So I try and embrace all that I can and cannot alter. The white horses rise and fall and glow green upon their ascent. Or maybe I'm jut seeing things. The light from cities is not far off. An orange aura over the hills. And all I can hear is the water lulling along the boat. This peace. This aloneness I wanted without the loneliness. Knowing I will be back with those I love all too soon.

I saw your faces in the stars tonight, you know. Shimmering and blue in my quickly fading memory. I left my camera behind. I do not hope to record these changes in that fashion. Leave my brain behind so I can let a machine do all the work for me. No, that is not my aim.

You cannot record this. The Milky Way, Plaetes, and perhaps a few golden planets. No Heisha and I am okay. My diosa de la luna will return. I find myself evolving once again.

Let the sand collect under my feet. It may do some good to acquire the patience I have lost.

Love is abound.